by accepting your true self unconditionally, allowing complete freedom of self expression with no judgement, expectations or preference. You allow your soul to express itself freely through you without any judgement from mind, without any expectation from mind and without any preference from mind. This is how you love yourself unconditionally and selflessly. 
when you reach inner divine union you align with your androgynous soul. Accepting of your soul and allowing it to express itself freely through you is actually accepting your inner divine masculine presence, accepting "him" as part of your trye self, allowing his aspect to shine and be expressed through you, to be accepted by you, to not be judged by you, for you not to judge him and not expect him to be a certain way. In this way, you love yourself and therefore your divine masculine unconditionally and selflessly. Your lack of rejection of the DM is a lack of rejection of yourself. It is a reintegration of your true self, your masc and feminine parts. It is an acceptance, validation and celebration of yiu, the whole you, the true you, the authentic you, the real you.

hoe do you aloe your true inner DM express himself freely through you? By aligning with soul as much as possible. Aligning with soul allows your DM to express himself in the physical through your vessel. Allow him to show his love for you, for self, through you. Eventually you will manifest this true DM externally to you too